Tuesday, January 12, 2010

Best Mum Ever

Not talking about me lah. But my mum :)

Before this trip back, Eddie and I were thinking about places to take the kids for outings. For Malacca, I remember thinking of taking them to walk around the old town centre, climb St Paul's Hill, take the river cruise...blah blah...none of these materialised, except for walking along the river to get to dinner in Jonker Street. For Singapore, Eddie suggested taking them to East Coast cycling, maybe the zoo...again, we never did.

What can I say, we are bloody lazy parents lah. And I get pretty bored out of my mind on outings to Science Centre or even the Zoo. I would find a bench to sit and then tell the kids to come back to me when they're done with a section. I like the zoo too, but even then, am not entirely enthusiastic what with the heat and walking. I wish I were more like my friend Karen, who's always fun to go to outings with, cos she'd be very gung-ho, with "Okay, where shall we go next?" "Let's" this and "Let's" that...with sweets and snacks prepared for the kids.

Anyway, today is a school holiday for Brian cos his school declared a holiday for good O level results. It would have been the perfect day to take the kids somewhere, and honestly, we would have (honest lah)...but we already made prior arrangements for mahjong at 3pm.

Yet, without us, the boys have headed off to Science Centre. With my mum! My mum had promised Sean she would take him there over the weekend, and when that didn't happen, he reminded her yesterday about her promise. Tough as nails my mum is, but she has this thing about promises made, and felt bad about it. So she's making her way all the way from the east to the west for a whole-day outing with the boys.

Me? I'm happy I'm off the hook and thankful I have such an awesome mum! When the boys were tots and in their strollers, my mum would take them for walks, to the playground, swimming...stuff I hardly do with them cos these things bore me. Aiyoh, the more I write, the more I'm sounding like the laziest mum ever.

When we were back for 3 months last year, she would prepare simple Chinese worksheets for Sean to do. She also did the same when Brian was small (Chinese, English, Math). Sean actually seemed more calm at home when he had these 'structured' activities to do with his grandmother, compared to normal days when he does nothing and comes to complain that he's bored while I face my computer.

So yes, my mum's awesome, she cooks great meals for the boys, makes sure they're always showered and clean, takes them out a lot, engages them to the best of her ability. Of course she gets on my nerves often, and I hers,...God knows how often we complain to our friends about each other...but I know she's always there for us...truly I am blessed to have the best mum ever.

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I just realised that she's kind of a key (must read post by the awesome Monica Lim) to me, and a key to my boys, but I guess having a key in small doses is still okay. Overseas, I no longer have a key, and the boys aren't lucky enough to have me as a key :) So it's all good.

16 comments:

Puzzled by Puzzles! said...

Aw...your mom sounds so sweet, like mine! Really!!!
Sometimes, I wonder what motivates her to do all these (cos I am so lazy too :P). If my kids say they want to eat certain breakfast/ food, she will make sure they get it , even though it means waking up REALLY early to go to the mkt to buy and prepare them, rain or shine. My mom also brought them to SSC ! (which I am always bored to death and tears.... looking for and complaining at the lack of benches there). When we are back, she and my dad are the ones who bring them to The Hort (very HOT) Park, Henderson bridge(?)etc. She will even bring them to OG just to let them browse at newest Lego and Barbies when I would be saying "u guys have so many toys at home already, what's there to see?" :P

Lilian said...

Haha, alamak, didn't know you are so much like me, the bored to tears and death part! Your parents are fantastic. I know if my mum knew her way around Singapore, she'd also bring them to those places. In Malacca, she's always keen to drive us to the places of attraction, but she gets too much protest from me. Hot lah.

When the boys were younger, she would make them very nutritious porridge, always with Ikan Kurau. There's always double-boiled soup, sometimes with kampung chicken if we're back in Malacca.

I tell myself that these old folks just enjoy doing things for us and their grandkids. Sometimes, gotta learn to receive these blessings graciously and learn not to feel bad :)

Anonymous said...

Your mum is soooo sweet! Reading your post making me miss my mother more... She used to cook for J everyday day the kurau porridge.

ok, *now I thick skin a bit*, I am a very 'hard-working' mum. I will go all the way out to do things to make my kids happy, be it waking up early to prepare the snack they requested for their lunch box, or sacrificing waking up late on Sunday morning to bring them for a morning swim. My hb & I both dislike outdoor activities, but for our kids, we will bring them to the places they wanted to go. I think I will do the same for my grandkids.

Chris

monlim said...

Eh, can I borrow your mum? Hehehe... Yah, I'm like you, I see the value of bringing my kids to experience a whole variety of stuff, but so lazy lah! Thankfully, Kenneth is very gungho abt such things like going to the zoo, to the nature reserve, SSC, etc. For me, I'll rather stay home but no choice, sometimes kena dragged along.

I think it's different for grandparents, having gone through the hectic times with their kids, they wanna just be there and please the grandkids. My mil is a big time key too but like you say, it's nice in small doses, esp if we're the beneficiaries!

Elan said...

Dear Lillian,
Hate to tell you this but today was NOT a school holiday leh...
Anyway, I bet Brian learnt as much at the Science Centre!

elan

Lilian said...

Chris: You are really 'wei da de ma ma'...next time I tumpang my boys with you for outings can? :)

Mon: You're lucky lah Kenneth is so on. My poor kids :( Glad they got to go to Science Centre today even though it entailed playing truant (unknowingly) -- see Elan's comment!

Elan: Aiyohhh...it's 1am now and I just got back from mahjong. When I left for mahjong, the boys and my mum were not back yet. Then while I was playing mahjong, Brian called me and said, "Mummy, you're going to be really angry." I asked why...and he mumbled something about today not being a holiday...I think he saw from his friends' facebooks that there was school today! I didn't scold him lah, just said he's gotta explain to his teacher.

How ah? So blur one? Half an hour later, he called again, this time asking when I was coming back cos he wanted to talk to me about boarding school! He's been saying he wants to board as soon as possible (as in this year!), and this episode convinced him that if he had been in boarding school, he wouldn't have missed going to school. I didn't manage to speak to him, but I'm gonna tell him he doesn't need to board, he just needs to open his mouth and ask people around him about things, not assume stuff! Maybe he's right, maybe going to boarding school earlier will make him less blur...

Lilian said...

When I woke my laptop up, I saw that he had been researching about ACSI's boarding school, and downloaded documents on eligibility and fees...sigh...

breve1970 said...

Sandy: I remember talking to your mum on the phone when we were way back in sec school. She was really nice and gentle when I spoke to her then. Wow, you mean she and your dad would bring the kids to SSC and Hort Park! Thats great!!!

Lilian: Your mum is really nice. Mine prefers to stay at home but no complaints lah. She is really tired looking after my nieces now. My dad sometimes does the ferrying for me if I am stuck at work. So am very fortunate to have both of them to help me.

Chris: I am also quite thick-skinned. I like to do things for my girls too. So am glad that I am now able to work in the mornings and spend time with them in the afternoon. We can all go out together and help babysit Lilian's boys too:):).

monlim said...

Your Brian is growing up. It's a bittersweet feeling but look on the bright side, it's good that he's so independent and able to think ahead for his own future. Better than someone still tugging on his mummy's apron strings, right? I know you have a tough choice ahead of you. Keep praying about it! The right decision will open itself up :)

Lilian said...

Ann: Will take you up on your offer! Yay, free babysitting :)

Mon: I started tearing just now thinking about him worrying about this and that...where is the relaxed, happy-go-lucky, bochap boy? Thanks, I will pray about this...as Sandy said to me, we need to learn when to let go too. But he's only 12...

Puzzled by Puzzles! said...

Wah...Chris, u put us to shame leh. I also want to tumpang my kids with you! :)

Ann, back then, my mom loved to receive calls from you. She said u have the sweetest and most gentle voice. I am sure the other ladies will agree with me.

Lilian, oops! I hope it is not those links I have sent that he was downloading.:P I think right now, it good to know that there is this option to consider. Although Brian is or appears to be independent right now, 12 is also the age whereby they want to make decisions for themselve, not thinking too much if it is the best for them. That's when we have to explain and hopefully get their consensus. I still think going back to in Moscow (even for a few mths - one yr) will help in putting things into perspective. I am sure u and your family will find answers soon. ;)

Lilian said...

Sandy: Looks like we are really very similar huh hehe...anyway, we both know Chris and Ann, and since are so selfless, we might as well be free-riders and tumpang our kids with them. Everyone who knows Ann will agree she's just the sweetest lah...so she was like that even as a schoolgirl huh :)

Haha I don't think the links are from you, cos yours was in my Facebook message box. I think he was worried enough to google about the boarding facilities. Trouble about this is I don't really know what's best for him...we definitely need to get him back to Moscow to see how he really feels after a while.

Elan said...

When I was young, I always wanted to be sent to boarding school. It was this romantic notion that I had from reading too much Enid Blyton (Mallory Towers and St Claire's)and thinking that it would be so fun. I don't think Brian would have read things like that. Later in Uni, I wanted to stay in the hostel for the freedom (but was bribed by my parents with a car instead to stay home).
I always think that something is missing in my education from not having stayed away from home. That's why I can't sew. do housework (not even iron a shirt) or anything. So there may be some good in letting him stay in the boarding house. However, as a mummy, I do also understand how hard it is to let go of our babies. Do keep praying about it, I'm sure God will point you in the right direction.

elan

Lilian said...

Thanks for sharing Elan. I posted something about this a minute ago.

breve1970 said...

Thanks for your compliments, Sandy and Lilian. Send my regards to your mum, Sandy:). I am no longer the goody two shoes schoolgirl that you once knew. Have grown to be a bitter, impatient and bad tempered middle-age woman lah! :(.

Lilian said...

Bitter, impatient and bad tempered? haha, only in your head lah, dear...to the rest of us, you're still exuding goodness and sweetness without even trying.